Barry Petchesky

Attending a major sporting event can be exhausting, expensive, and demeaning. But there has always been at least one game-day opportunity that can provide a little bit of satisfaction: the ability to buy an ice-cold bottle of water from a guy with a cooler in the parking lot for a buck or two, and then bring your prize into the stadium. Look at you, all hydrated and frugal!

The Stanley Cup Final is, to use the industry term, drunk off its ass. Not one game, not one occurrence has seemed to follow logically from what came before it. Goals are plentiful. Goalkeeping is optional. Leads are temporary, and possibly even cursed: Each of the four games has seen multi-goal leads evaporate. (Empirically, the only sure thing is to go up four that lead will disappear too, but you'll get it back in overtime.) Is it good hockey? It's hockey, that's for sure. Is it fun hockey? "Not really," said Carolina coach Rod Brind'Amour. "It's pretty stressful."

There are very few people on Earth who want to see Carter Hart in net for Vegas. Most of them are Golden Knights fans, but no one cares what they think because they are Golden Knights fans. One of them is John Tortorella, who has displayed a deep and occasionally baffling level of loyalty to the goalie, likely dating to their time in Philadelphia. The only others are the Carolina Hurricanes, because they have been beating the shit out of Hart every night and would like that to continue.

With a 94-90 win in Game 5, yet another doughty comeback and superlative Jalen Brunson takeover, the New York Knicks are NBA Champions. This is an unsettling and unusual thing to say, because they are the New York Knicks.

Days of humidity had finally broken with a thunderstorm the night before. Brazilians were all over midtown, getting ready for their World Cup game. Puerto Rican and Pride flags were everywhere. "Knicks in five" was no longer a shibboleth or even a prediction; it was thecity's standard greeting. It was a glorious Saturday to be out in New York.

Brady Tkachuk will join his co-podcaster Matthew on the Mar-a-Lago Panthers. Let's address the hockey stuff first. A scary forward group gets even scarier, and more irritating to play against; there are no real soft spots or ceded shifts in the three top lines. After a lost season following two straight Cups, Florida figures to come back as strong as ever. This is a mixed bag depending on your tolerance for the Panthers.

The Dog Days of summer in the Northern Hemisphere don't officially begin until the rising of Sirius, the "dog star."

I think it's important we set some axioms for discussion of Anaheim's Leo Carlsson signing an offer sheet with Philadelphia , because it helps a

The Carolina Hurricanes are worthy NHL champs, plowing through the playoffs with a 16-3 record. It's a victory of commitment to an approach, as head coach Rod Brind'Amour's system finally paid ultimate dividends after seven years of postseason exits. It's a victory for bloggers everywhere, thanks to the employment of GM Eric Tulsky and analyst Tyler Dellow(!). But most important, it's a victory for family. The Dundon family, specifically. No other families.

Norway's charmed and charming run to the World Cup quarterfinals has been a good time all around. Erling Haaland is probably the most lovingly memed man on Earth at the moment, and with good reason . The Norwegians are getting really into cowboy fashion. It's all very fun. They seem like a fun hang. And they are rowing. They are rowing after wins. They are rowing in Times Square . They are rowing up the escalator.