Filip Bondy

The perfect half of soccer. There it was on Friday night, performed with full grace under pressure at the World Cup, by the U.S. national soccer team in its opening game before a packed, raucous audience at Los Angeles Stadium.

This is how it works, of course. England's national soccer team looks strong, looks practically unbeatable. England wins. England wins some more.

Pulisic starred in several television commercials that aired during the game, but was unavailable for the actual match while rehabbing a calf injury.

You probably don't even know what he sounds like. Lionel Messi almost never speaks in English.

The U.S. soccer team finally beat a European opponent on Wednesday, snapping a brutal, 10-game losing streak against that fabled, football continent with a plucky 2-0 victory over Bosnia and Herzegovina. They accomplished this with only 10 men on the field for the last half hour of play, and with a Beckham-like set piece from Malik Tillman.

All the fuss, the Fox hype, the controversy, the expectations — they all amounted to absolutely nothing Monday night when the U.S. team was embarrassed in the Round of 16 by a soccer nation with the population of Ohio.

They did not exactly exit with dignity or grace. The Ugly Americans bombed out of the World Cup on Monday night in the worst possible fashion.

It was a ridiculous match, really, like watching 11 men in red desperately trying to pry the lid off a stubborn jar of jam.

It was a ridiculous match, really, like watching 11 men in red desperately trying to pry the lid off a stubborn jar of jam.

It wasn't always like this, not even close. Forty-six-million Americans were not watching a U.S. soccer game on television, and 25 million weren't busy playing the sport.