Neil Tollfree

FIFA is set for criticism over plans to charge fans for thinking about the World Cup for the duration of the tournament.

Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor received an undisclosed, supplementary income from a ‘Find the Lady’ game he ran in St. James’s Park over thirty years, the public spending watchdog has revealed.

Thanos, the mad Titan who recently eliminated half the human race, has dramatically called a by-election. “I am sick of being constantly badgered by the establishment for doing nothing more than

Count Binface, the man who stands between Nigel Farage and his destiny of being the rightful Queen of England, today stands exposed as being neither a Count nor a bin.

Experts in the emerging field of grain orthoepy have announced that quinoa is not pronounced like that.

Kemi Badenoch and her gang have officially welcomed Andy Burnham to Parliament by bog-washing him and nicking his dinner money.

New Prime Minister Andy Burnham has pledged to introduce a new Number 10 on the moon that will be responsible for carrying out all moon-related policy and business.

Andy Burnham’s Minister for Getting Damn Funky has come into his new department with a bold pledge to make the country 75% funkier than it is currently.

An eye-catching plan to move Leeds 43 miles closer to Manchester is the headline proposal in the new ‘Get the North Moving’ scheme to improve transport links in the North of England.

It is with considerable regret that after careful consideration, the United States will not be able to commit military support to Ukraine in defence against the military operation by Russia. Whilst we understand that this will come as a disappointment, it must be understood that the US has an ongoing military commitment to blowing up little Venezuelan dinghies bobbing around the Caribbean Sea.