Jackie Sikes

One day, I will grow old. When my oldest granddaughter was 4 we watched a movie where a couple rode horses on the beach. I commented that I wanted to do that one day before I die. My granddaughter looked up at me with a true look of horror and yelled, “You can't die.” I went on to tell her that it wasn't my intention to die anytime soon, but it wasn't anything for her to be upset about right now. This did not satisfy her, and she fell silent for a few seconds, then she said, “How ‘bout this? You just cancel your birthdays,' and then you won't grow old like Nini (that's her other grandmother) and die.” (Nini is older than me by about 10 years, maybe). Wow. Did that thought process just come out of a 4-year-old? OK, I'll bite. I asked, “Well, that sounds like that would work. So when should I start canceling my birthdays?” “Well, how old are you now?” “Forty-five.” I replied. Without hesitating, she said, “You can start now.” I guess 45 was old enough.

This week, our community lost a hero, a father, a family member, a friend and our fire chief suddenly due to a very tragic accident.

You've heard the saying about weddings and funerals, right? We only see each other at weddings and funerals. Both occasions are considered celebrations. The couple is celebrating the beginning of their life's journey as husband and wife. The family and friends of the deceased call it a celebration of life. Both of these events have some things in common. People gather, visit, eat and reminisce at a wedding. At weddings, we talk about the couple when they were young, how they met, and their plans for the future. It's the same at a funeral: we visit and share pictures of the deceased when they were young, see and share stories, eat, and reminisce.

Use more wisdom when you speak your words. Words can lift up or tear down, give hope or steal it, and bring joy or sadness. When we talk, the words we speak impact others. I think that spending most of the day gossiping, complaining, and being negative causes feelings of anger and depression. When someone speaks negatively constantly, I firmly believe that it causes severe depression and a darkness over their heart. This darkness does not allow the good and the light to enter.

You know the metaphorical saying, “Don't judge a book by its cover.” This saying means we should never judge someone or something based on their appearance. Have you done this before? Have you had this done to you? I would have to say yes to both questions, and I'm not proud of making those judgments, but I'll admit that I just recently did this. Now, I would like to point out this statement by saying that this judgment was not against a person but about an object. I rarely judge anyone before I give them an opportunity for us to get to know each other. In fact, I've gotten myself in a pickle or two because I'm too kind and trusting. I will go on to say, but that's how I want to be. I want to be “too nice”. I want to be nonjudgmental and trust. Until someone proves otherwise, I will give them the benefit of the doubt, and in some cases, I give them more than one try.

A dear friend gave me the gift of rhythm. What does that mean? Well, Sean and I were blessed this week when a friend gave us two tickets to see Malevo at the Reynolds Performance Hall in Conway. Malevo is a group of men from Argentina who perform traditional dances to the beat of the bombo leggero drum. They have performed in cities worldwide and on America's Got Talent, and they are outstanding! What a great gift for this “retired” dancer. I know the hard work and dedication it takes to put on a performance like these men did, and it was just incredible. I feel so grateful that I got to enjoy this, but I also feel bad that my friend couldn't have gone because I know she would have enjoyed it as much as I did. It may have been a simple thing for her to think of me and give me this gift, but it meant so much to me because I miss dancing and performing. I love all forms of theater and recently had a great time performing with the newest group in our community, Centerstage at the Bay.

When the going gets tough, cuddle a child. Nothing is more perfect than holding an innocent little child in your arms after an exceptionally tough day. Many times over the years, I've sought refuge by putting my arms around my child and now my grandchildren and great-grandchildren. There is such peace, complete love, and innocence in that sweet sleeping face. Over the years, one of my favorite things has been watching a child sleep. Granted, this isn't a great way to get sleep myself, but it sure makes me happy. I see that precious sleeping face and count my blessings.

Early voting starts this week. Last week, I had an hour-and-a-half interview on political incivility. What is political incivility? Incivility is defined as formal rudeness or impoliteness. Disagreements between people are constant. Sometimes disagreements are productive, but lately, disagreements between people have escalated to the point where, in some instances, they become physically violent. In a 2019 report, 93 percent of respondents thought incivility is a problem in America, 68 percent see it as a crisis, and 74 percent think it's worsening. Oh, let's hope not because it has gotten so bad. I've seen friends become enemies. I've witnessed people yelling at each other, social media posts have been volatile, and I've even witnessed these political disagreements become physically violent.

Halloween and trick or treating are behind us, but giving treats is always in season. I've never been very good at tricking people, but I love giving treats. In past years, I belonged to a group of ladies who called themselves the Fairy Godmothers of IRV. IRV was the name of the assisted living and nursing home in Fairfield Bay. They have changed owners and are now the Springs. This group of ladies would sign up to donate small treats for all IRV residents. There are usually over one hundred residents, and we did everything from making handmade Christmas stockings and filling them with treats to a simple tray goodie for St. Patrick's Day. COVID-19 ceased the activities of the Fairy Godmothers, but they picked up a year later. Then, we fizzled again. I'm excited to say we are back and even stronger than before. We aim to give each resident a “treat” at least once a month. They also have a company store where they use their bingo bucks to buy more treats and personal products.

Well, I did a thing this week ... I retired. I didn't think the day would ever come. This time in my life is very confusing. It's strange not to have a “plan” each morning when I get up, and there isn't a need for an alarm clock. Wow, who would have thought? It's such a relief after a very challenging past year. I know that they say when one door closes, another one opens. For me, that saying has always been more like when one door closes, I climb out the window.